


Bad memories

by maxiemoo01



Series: Misguided short stories [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Angst, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has Panic Attacks, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Needs a Hug, Being restrained, Blood, Blood and Violence, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt, Flashbacks, Gun Violence, Hurt No Comfort, I think it falls under that at least, M/M, Minor Character Death, Panic Attacks, Past Character Death, Past Child Abuse, Past Domestic Violence, Past Violence, Restraints, Violence, Violent Panic Attacks, blood mention, past gun violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:20:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24932896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maxiemoo01/pseuds/maxiemoo01
Summary: Virgil gets hit with a particular trigger
Relationships: Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: Misguided short stories [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1992772
Comments: 7
Kudos: 102





	Bad memories

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna go ahead and give warnings here but please check the tags this ones kind of rough
> 
> CW: mentions of blood, mentions of gun violence, panic attacks, violent outbursts, triggers, violent panic attacks, being restrained, possible hurt/no comfort? (Not sure if this falls under that) past character death, minor character death, flashbacks

Virgil had been on edge all day, his anxiety was through the roof and he had no reason for it.

So he was currently sitting on the couch, the tv was playing and Virgil had no clue what it was, he wasn't paying any attention to it, it was mostly on just to give some noise in the room while Logan and Patton worked on making dinner together. 

Virgil's knees were pulled to his chest, head resting in between them, he was just letting his mind go, trying to just let the thoughts float by instead of listening to them, it was hard but it seemed to be working. 

The TVs volume was set pretty low, Virgil just wanted some background noise, but the mistake Virgil had made was not paying attention to what was on, because next thing he knew a loud gunshot rang through the speakers. 

His hands went to his ears, tears filled his eyes and he squeezed them shut tightly as images of his mother's body flashed through his mind, the glazed over eyes, the blood pooling from her head, the way his father paced the room, leaving bloody footprints around it. 

Tears were flowing down his cheeks, his entire body was shaking and he was simply shaking his head, and then a hand was on his shoulder and he shouted. "NO!" He threw himself back, back hitting the arm of the couch roughly, he couldn't let him touch him, no, he was gonna kill him too for sure, he was going to make him join his mother. 

He started thrashing, he wasn't thinking about anything but getting away, clawing at anything that tried to get near him, he couldn't hear anything, he couldn't hear anything but the gun shot, the ringing in his ears, he was gonna die. 

"No! No please dont, no!" His body was shaking, his hands moved to his hair as he continued to kick the air, trying to make sure nothing got close to him, he wouldn't let his father kill him, no he didn't want to die, he didn't want to, not like this. 

He felt a hand on his wrist and his other hand immediately moved to it and clawed down it with his nails as he attempted to pull it away, and then another hand was on his other wrist, holding them down, tears continued to steadily stream down his face as he thrashed and kicked and shouted, and then two hands grabbed his ankles and held him down.

He continued to trash as he opened his eyes and looked at who was holding him, his mother's lifeless body looked back at him, holding his legs down. He let out a scream and continued to thrash harder against his father restraining him, this wasn't happening, he couldn't let this happen no, no it couldn't.

Virgil was hyperventilating, chest heaving as he tired himself out from fighting, tears simply streaming down his cheeks as he let out a whimper, nothing he did was gonna work, he was gonna die and he couldn't do anything about it. 

His body was shaking and slowly his breath started to even out and the tears came to a stop, and when he looked down he saw Patton, and then he looked up and saw Logan, and the tears started again as he realized what had happened, he pulled at his wrists. "Dad?" He said, voice cracking, Logan nodded, letting go of his wrists, that's when he saw the deep claw marks on Logan's wrist and flinched, Patton let go of his legs and Virgil sat up, throwing himself into Logan's arms.

  
  


***

  
  


Logan had just finished cutting up vegetables when he heard the gunshot from the tv, he thought nothing of it until he heard Virgil mumbling, that's when it clicked in his head and he sat the knife in the sink, wandering to the living room, Virgil was shaking and Logan knelt in front of him, gently reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder without thinking about it. Virgil flung himself back and Logan winced as his back hit the arm of the couch. "NO!" he shouted, and then Logan heard footsteps and Patton was joining him.

When Patton stepped forward Virgil began to thrash about, hands clawing at the air and catching Patton's arm as he tried to step away, Patton looked worriedly at Logan, who was watching Virgil with concern as he kicked and trashed, eyes squeezed shut tightly and tears pouring down his cheeks. 

"Logan?" Patton asked, Logan shook his head. 

"We can't really do anything, he's gotta just ride this one through."

"No! Please dont no!" Virgil shouted, and his hands moved from clawing the air to his hair, he was tugging at it, and Logan watched as he pulled a chunk out of the already damaged hair and quickly decided what needed to happen. 

"Patton I'm gonna grab his arms and hold him down, I need you to grab his ankles and do the same, if we don't restrain him he's going to hurt himself." Patton nodded.

Logan moved beside Virgil's head, grabbing one of his wrists, flinching when Virgil clawed deep scratches into his wrist, before he grabbed the other wrist and firmly held them against the arm of the couch, Virgil started kicking, and it took Patton a few tries to grab his legs and hold him down. 

Virgil continued to fight them, but he opened his eyes and looked right at Patton, a far away look in his eyes before he screamed and started thrashing around harder, trying to pull his hands and legs away.

Eventually Virgil's fighting died down to him just hyperventilating, however Patton and Logan kept their holds on him. He was shaking, but the tears were starting to dry on his cheeks and his breathing began to even out, and this time when he opened his eyes and saw Patton the far away look was gone, and then he looked at Logan, tears started to stream down his cheeks again, and his voice cracked as he spoke. "Dad?"

Logan nodded, thankful for Virgil having calmed and pulled his hands from Virgil's wrists, not missing the way Virgil's eyes caught the scratches and he flinched, Logan looked over at Patton and gave a small nod so Patton let go of his legs, and then Virgil was throwing himself into Logans arms, head resting on his shoulder as they sat on the floor. 

  
  


***

  
  


"I'm sorry!" He cried out, gripping onto Logan's shirt, he felt a hand on his back and then one on his shoulder as he cried into his dad's shoulder for a bit, slowly pulling away after a long while. 

"Are you okay Virgil?" Logan asked, looking at him warily. Virgil looked to Patton, taking in the worried and hesitant looks on both their faces and nodded softly. 

"I'm sorry…" Patton shook his head and knelt down, putting his hand back onto the teenagers shoulder. 

"Don't be sorry kiddo, it's okay, sometimes things happen." Patton said, giving him a small smile. 

"But I hurt you, both of you." Virgil said, gesturing to their scratches. Logan shook his head. 

"They're superficial, we'll clean them and bandage them and they will heal in a matter of days. It's fine Virgil, we're okay." Virgil looked down and nodded. 

"Do you wanna talk about what happened kiddo?" Virgil shook his head. 

"No I… I think I just wanna take a nap before dinner." Patton nodded and him and Logan stood, Virgil followed soon after and grabbed a blanket from the back of the couch, laying down on it, he grabbed the remote and turned the tv off, and curled up under the heavy blanket.

Patton and Logan looked at each other, then to their son, Patton let out a small sigh, hugging Logan tightly.

Virgil being upset or having problems never got easier for Patton, he still wished he could take away all the things that happened to Virgil and instead have him since he was a baby, but he knew that would never happen. 

"Come on love, let's get these scratches bandaged and finish dinner okay?" Patton nodded silently and followed Logan to the bathroom where they kept the first aid kit.

Ignoring the pain in his heart as he looked back at Virgil one last time


End file.
